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CONTENTS          
0 Home
1 Introduction
2 Sex Please
3 Rome Antics
4 Rome Spell Neat
5 Kin King Klan King
6 Romana Be Public
7 Patrician Attrition
8 Appalling Gaul
9 Roaming Italy
10 Satiric Pyrrhic
11 Rome In Poem
12 Gods Be Lazy
13 Conclusion

 


2 SEX PLEASE, WE'RE ETRUSCAN


Chapter 2 of The Bloody Funny History of Rome begins in Italy (Herd of Cow Land?) with Rome squashed between the great Etruscan League above, and Greater Greece below. Party-goers at Greek towns like bad Sins and Sybaris dine while holding portable urinals between their knees - which saves them from ever having to leave the table! Sex Please, We're Etruscan opens the painted Etruscan tombs depicting orgiastic dancing, drinking games, and outdoor sex where slaves double as beds. Diverse tombs delves into the unique Tomb of the Diver to make a big splash! The ferocious Samnites put an end to all this fun, and crying at funerals instead becomes fashionable, and even endures until today.

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